Dirty-Sounding Basketball Phrases

by John Schoneboom

Let me admit straightaway that there's nothing particularly novel about the sexual double entendre value of sports-related terminology. On the other hand, pointing it out occasionally is always good for a laugh regardless. Furthermore, the sheer frequency of loaded phrases is fairly astonishing once you start marking them down, even allowing for the fact that even the most innocuous phrases begin to sound distinctly lascivious once you've tuned your ear in a certain way. In any case, the following are actual phrases used during a single actual basketball game, for your (or perhaps only my) childish amusement:

  1. Gets to the rack
  2. Takes it to the hole
  3. Takes it hard to the hole
  4. Rattles the rim
  5. Got a nice stroke going in a good rhythm, boy he is really feeling it right now
  6. Producing from the post
  7. Big men posting up
  8. Pulls up, lets one fly
  9. Pound that thing inside
  10. Relentlessly pounding it down low
  11. That's a lot of big bodies banging hard down low
  12. Violation
  13. Battling underneath
  14. Ridnour up top, Crawford on him
  15. Throwin' it down hard
  16. Pulls up, shoots, it's good!
  17. Giving him everything he wants right now at the defensive end
  18. Takes him on nose to nose and says let's go, let's see who's better tonight

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